November 14, 2004
Dinner Pary (in Deutsch)
All seven of us crowded into a borrowed car to drive up to Bettina's for a dinner party. She lives half an hour outside of Innsbruck and up a winding mountain with a narrow road and no guardrails. I've only been there in the dark. All I know is that the mountains keep going even after the row of lights stops.
The table was set with candles, crystal, and white plates. We had a traditional Tirolean meal. And everyone was speaking. Most of the time, everyone was speaking in German. Of course they were. It's their native tongue. And every once in a while, one of the girls would recognize that we weren't laughing when they were and remember, "oh yes, they don't speak German" and translate the joke for us. Our delayed laugh was at least still a laugh. It's not that we didn't have a good time when we played Activities - drawing out German words on paper, trying to make others guess without saying the word, or using charades. The frantic looking through the dictionary and written notes across the table when the word wasn't found quite as it was used, and then the lapsing back into German anyway was still all amusing. We even had the upperhand when we played Scattergories. I mean, the likelihood of matching words in English with those in German was much less for the two of us than for the five of them.
And then when we bundled back up in the car, the English speakers stuffed in the very back seat, to drive down the hill. I looked out the snow-streaked back window and tried to figure out what was so unsatisfactory about the experience. What would make it better?
I don't expect them to give up speaking their language and change their lives just to be inclusive of two girls that will only be around for a couple months. I appreciate every time they translate and speak in English, struggling for words. And I know I will revel in the luxury of understanding the nuances of my native language when I return to the States, but somehow it still just leaves me feeling ... lonely, insignificant, obligatory, isolated, overwhelmed, and unnecessary. Yeah, all things you want to feel on a Saturday night with friends.
Posted by kea at November 14, 2004 12:43 AM